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5/20/2013 10:21:00 AM 'The Farmer' and Nancy's health quest is complete
Don’t read this column at the breakfast table. Last week I finished yet another quest that I started a few years ago. It had become more of a quest when “The Farmer” turned 81 last month, but without any nagging, just an ultimatum, that if “he” continued to skirt the issue, he would do it alone. I told him that he went through it with me and I’m sure that I didn’t make any big deal out of it that would leave such fear embedded in his brain. Our son and our son’s wife have gone through it and they still are walking this earth and happy to be able to say, “no big deal.” “I know the men at work are bullying you about it, but just pay no attention and tell them to bug off,” I told him. But then yet another report about a distant relative of mine and of middle age was reported to having to go through yet another mess because attention wasn’t given soon enough, and it could end his life. “The Farmer” finally gave in. What am I talking about? Of course, what else? “The Farmer” finally gave in and last Friday off we went up to the hospital in Monroe, Wis., and there is where my quest ended with a thumbs up procedure that the doctor who preformed it said, “you don’t have to come back, every thing was clear.” Where upon he handed us a set of gross pictures to prove it and an hour later he was wheeled to the PT Cruiser for the ride back home. I, of course, was driving. His colonoscopy was a success, no problems. I handed him the sandwich and orange I had brought along, for he hadn’t eaten for a number of hours and I knew he would have missed his favorite pass time of grazing the feed bunk. He was very hesitant to go through with this, as I’m sure you are, but he would tell you now that there was nothing to it. Again, they were amazed that an 81-year-old man takes no prescription drugs. The reason probably is because he hasn’t been to a doctor in more than six or seven years. Or, it could be because his wife is Italian and she feeds him garlic and extra virgin olive oil and all spring we have had a green salad of Italian radicchio and Italian Lechuga Rosalita with olive oil and vinegar, all good stuff to clean out anyone’s plumbing system. We won’t even talk about the beef liver we had the other night over polenta and Romano cheese and of course, every night, “The Farmer” has a jelly glass of Italian red wine with either one of my biscotti cookies or the ones that friend Ken sent him for his birthday. I must admit that Ken’s are better looking than the ones I bake and maybe even taste a tiny bit better. At any rate, my friends, if “The Farmer” finally got up the nerve to have his plumbing checked, and if you haven’t, shouldn’t you? Ninety five, or is it 96-year-old Cousin Leo said that a group he belongs to had a doctor once that spoke to them and said, “no one should die of colon cancer.” Meaning that if you go and have your plumbing checked you should be all right. I’ve read much on the subject where many suggestions are made as to the age you should have the procedure done, the best one to ask is someone in the medical profession. For “The Farmer,” they told him he doesn’t have to have it done again. Time will tell. For me, because they found one polyp and snipped it off, I’m to go back for a “plumbing” check in five years. Don’t listen to those that say it is awful, because it isn’t, everyone says the worse part is the night before and the “liquid” you have to drink to clean out your “plumbing.” Having said all that, some of the stuff some of you drink as a recreational beverage, couldn’t be any worse on your “plumbing.” So do yourself a favor and stop being a sissy and be brave like “The Farmer” has been and get your “personal plumbing” tended to and you will thank him for letting me tell all of you that he is fine and so am I. Ciao!
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